You are perfect just as you are, and you can use a little improvement.
Marc's latest blogs from Doingless.net
Less Fear
A mind that has any form of fear cannot, obviously, have the quality of love, sympathy, tenderness. Fear is the destructive energy in man.
— J. Krishnamurti
Fear can be a useful ally. It can focus us, keep us safe, even at times keep us alive. Fear of illness or injury can motivate us to stop smoking, to exercise, and to eat healthier food. In our communities, it can motivate us to make our air and water cleaner, our bridges and levees stronger, our workplaces safer.
Enlightened, Fool, or Enlightened Fool
For many years I was the primary “manager” of the early-morning routines in my house — waking my children, making breakfast and lunches, getting the kids to the kitchen table and to school, on time. Every day the challenges were unique — some days there were no clean socks, or someone overslept, or one or both kids just didn’t feel like eating. Once we sat down to breakfast, we often experienced a few moments of calm. At other times I would have to remind my kids that breakfast is a noncontact sport! After dropping them off at their schools, I felt a sense of relief and accomplishment. The rest of the day, being CEO of a small, growing, complex company seemed easy in comparison to the task of getting my children to school, on time, every morning.
The Practice of Right Speech
There is a Zen story about two groups of monks arguing over a cat. The teacher, in response to the conflict, picks up the cat in one hand and a knife in the other. He says to the group of monks, “Say something of the truth of Zen, or I will cut the cat in half.” No one said anything, and the cat was killed. (Remember, this is a story — I’ve always imagined that the teacher pretended to kill the cat.) Later, the teacher was describing this event to one of his most revered students. Upon hearing what had happened, this student, without saying a word, took off his sandals, put them on his head, and left the room. The teacher said, “If only you had been there, the cat would have been saved.”
What did this student do to save the cat? What does this story have to do with business and our work lives?
Shift Your Relationship With Time
No time. Not enough time. Too busy. I hear this problem nearly every day, from my executive coaching clients, friends, family.
Many years ago, when I was a student living at Zen Center’s Green Gulch Farm, it was my welding teacher, Harry Roberts, who taught that the secret of welding is to see that the natural state of metal is actually liquid. By applying heat, we soften it to its original condition, and make it flexible, allowing it to be changed with little effort. Harry laughed as he told me this, and said this is the secret of being a human being as well. Our world, and time appear solid, he said. Our belief in this solid world leads us to act in ways that are similar to attempting to shape metal while it is hard. Instead, our minds and bodies are much more fluid than we usually assume; our world is less permanent, and more possibilities exist than we conventionally imagine
Take A Break For A Breakthrough
Mark Jung-Beeman is a cognitive neuroscientist at Northwestern University, and he has studied what happens inside the brain when people have an insight. He was quoted in a recent New Yorker article, saying: “If you want to encourage insights, then you’ve got to also encourage people to relax.” The article notes that “Jung-Beeman’s latest paper investigates why people who are in a good mood are so much better at solving insight puzzles.”
What Jung-Beeman has discovered is that insight and creative solutions can be inhibited or blocked by being overly focused. Instead, what is often needed for insight is to focus on not focusing. The article continues, “As Jung-Beeman and Kounios [a cognitive neuroscientist at Drexel University] see it, the insight process is an act of cognitive deliberation — the brain must be focused on the task at hand — transformed by accidental, serendipitous connections. We must concentrate, but we must concentrate on letting the mind wander.”
Time Is On My Side
“In essence, all things in the entire world are linked with one another as moments. Because all moments are the time-being, they are your time-being.” Zen teacher Dogen, from a talk in the year 1240, Japan
Many years ago, when I was a student living at Zen Center’s Green Gulch Farm, it was my welding teacher, Harry Roberts, who taught that the secret of welding is to see that the natural state of metal is actually liquid. By applying heat, we soften it to its original condition, and make it flexible, allowing it to be changed with little effort. Harry laughed as he told me this, and said this is the secret of being a human being as well. Our world, and time appear solid, he said. Our belief in this solid world leads us to act in ways that are similar to attempting to shape metal while it is hard. Instead, our minds and bodies are much more fluid than we usually assume; our world is less permanent, and more possibilities exist than we conventionally imagine.
Paradox: Less Stress: More Happiness
A paradox is something that appears to be contradictory, unbelievable, or absurd but may in fact be true. Do less. Accomplish more. These statements present a paradox. Acknowledging, owning, and embracing the paradoxical nature of our lives, the lives of others, and the world can lessen our resistance to change and increase our effectiveness. At its most basic it makes us less tense and more open to happiness.
When I look at my own life and self, I see that I embody a number of paradoxes. Here are a few:
I am shy and solitary, and I love speaking in front of people.
At work, I am completely myself, and I play a role.
I am firm and decisive, and I am cautious and conservative.
I am a businessman, and I am a Zen priest.
I can concentrate for long periods of time, and I’m easily distracted.
I am confident, and I’m extremely vulnerable.
Success, Failure, and the Impostor Syndrome
“I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”
- Michael Jordan
The “inner critic” seems to be the human condition. Perhaps it serves a positive role of keeping us out of danger by being on guard and suspect, or helping us strive to greater accomplishments. And, for many people, it is just a bad habit, a constant running of negative energy that tends to limit and constrict presence, effectiveness and joy.
Cultivate Peace Through Mindfulness
Mindfulness is a practice and a way of being. Mindfulness is the practice of being present for what is – in your body, your emotions, the emotions of others, your surroundings, for life. Benefits to the practice of mindfulness include increased peace and greater happiness. When someone asked the historical Buddha, How can I be more peaceful?, he responded, “When breathing a short breath, know that you are breathing a short breath. When breathing a long breath, know that you are breathing a long breath. Simple, yes. Easy, not always so easy.